Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Roulette, not the Russian kind

Today I'm going to share a story about Roulette. Not Russian Roulette, come on now...
Chat Roulette.

For those of you who don't know what Chat Roulette is - it's a website where you video chat with random people around the world. You can see them, and talk to them or type to them (whatever your preference is). If you connect with somebody that you're not interested in speaking with you hit the 'next' button and it connects you with someone new.

I've used the site in the past - just for shits n' giggles, but I haven't used it in years. Well on Friday night, I was home earlier than I normally would be on a Friday night and my insomnia kicked in full swing. There was literally NO chance of me going to sleep, so out of sheer boredom, I played on Chat Roulette. I was not expecting to be on the site for more than 10-15 minutes, but then I discovered the amazingness of video-chatting with random strangers.

I might have tweeted about it.

So then I started chatting, and because it's me, and I don't care about privacy - I took pictures of the people that I talked to.

I honestly 'nexted' about 30 peoples before I finally stopped to talk to someone. This is when the 'fun' began.

This kid was having a dance party and kept trying to tell me jokes. Oh, and he lives in Germany. I talked to him for five minutes before we parted ways.

I talked to drunk Mickey Mouse for a minute. I was highly amused.

This kid was from New Zealand and his accent amused me. He also spent the whole time sitting on an exercise ball.

I helped this guy with some of his life problems before we parted ways.

This guy doesn't believe in wearing clothes. He also believed that I should take off my clothes.
Hard no. I nexted him.
But, funny enough - I got to talk to him again. We talked for minute about breaking bad before I bid him adieu.

I probably should've stopped. But it was like 'OMG TOO FUN' at this point.

This is my model friend from India. I thoroughly enjoyed this kid and talked to him for close to an hour. We only stopped talking because my internet died - cue sad face.

This kid was highly entertaining. He was listening to some pretty explicit music and having a crazy dance party. I watched and laughed at him for a few minutes before I 'nexted' him.

This. Guy. Ohhhh this guy. He has a super creepy foot fetish. He tried to convince me to show him my feet because that's 'all that he needed'. I couldn't contain my laughter and actually ended up laughing IN HIS FACE (well, through cam obviously) and told him that it wasn't my style. Nexxxxt.

Who needs sleep anyway? Not me obviously.

These guys are from Turkey, and yes - I convinced them to show me their abs. Then they wanted to see mine, so I nexted them. Duh.

These two guys were really drunk.
The kid on the left asked me "have you ever seen a really big piece of shit?"
me: "ummm what?"
him: "cause that's how drunk I am".
Whaaaat? No. Just, no. NEXT.

This kid serenaded me with Adele music for a few minutes before I nexted him.

This weirdo fake stabbed himself and then played dead. Next.

This guy gave me an entertaining 'peck dance' for 30 seconds before I nexted him.

This guy lives in Vancouver - about 10 minutes away. Funny thing is that he's from the East Coast and literally lived TWO BLOCKS AWAY FROM ME when I lived in Newfoundland to attend University with my two best friends.
Such a small world. Sometimes.

Seriously, who stays up until 5:00am talking to random strangers? It might not have been my finest moment, but it seriously provided more entertainment than I can explain.

For the record - you can play an awesome drinking game with friends on Chat Roulette. Take a shot every time you see a dick. I promise you'll be drunk within 10-15 minutes.
Also, I'd like to make it clear that there were a lot of ugly dicks on Chat Roulette. I easily saw 30-40 dicks. Seriously. Get your crap together, guys. Nobody wants to see that nastiness.

I'd appreciate it if you didn't entirely judge me based on this post. However, I completely understand if you do. I mean, I kind of judge myself for this one.


Kathy @ Vodka and Soda said...

OMG this is like craigslist personals live! how awesome and hilarious.

i had no idea about this app but it seems like a total time suck!

Vodka and Soda

Helene in Between said...

I freaking love chat roulette!! i was on there one time for like 12 hours with my husband and our guy friend. ohhh the characters you meet.

Jay T said...

Hahahahahahahahaha!!! This solidifies even more why I love you.

Asia Reynolds said...

chat roulette is a hot mess lmao. The random black guy that asked for advice had me dying.

Elle Vee said...

ah hahaha I have never heard of this.. You told the story well though haha

Carolyn said...

OMG I just died. This sounds both terrifying and intriguing. And by that I mean, I know what I'm doing next time I'm bored in the middle of the night.

Pistol Pete said...

OK time for you to move back to Halifax ... you're freaking the heck out of your mother (I'm just shaking my head). Either you’re running down dark Vancouver alleys at 2 a.m. or you’re wandering down even darker internet alleys at 4 a.m. The reason you can’t sleep at 2 a.m. is because you never left Halifax time and you know you should be up for work by then.

Make good (better freakin') choices young lady. And when I was your age I didn’t blog about my BAD choices. (Oh wait, the internet didn’t exist then). Remember your August 13th blog disclaimer? You needed that for this one too … your parents (and aunti) are gonna have coronaries if you keep this up. Of course, if your aunti has a coronary it’ll be 5 hours before us since she’s in Poland, in which case we’ll get a good heads-up not to read your post that day.

I’m going to get your brother to teach me how to hack your computer for when we visit you later this month and permanently remove any possible access to “bad choice” web stuff (that’s possible, right?) Oh wait, never mind … you’re turning 25 years old in 26 days and all this nonsense will stop ‘cause you’ll be all-growed-up. Phew … hurry October.


Allie @ Tales of a TwentySomething said...

I literally LOL'd at the guy who fake stabbed himself and played dead. And then I thought "Oh this is kind of like speed dating" Which it totes is by the way. And the last guy, he's cute. Oh and PS. I'm so glad you took their pictures. I hope you took pictures of the weird looking dicks so you could send them to Sami, Jilly and I. If not, you failed. Which just means you'll have to do that again so you CAN. KTHANKSBYE

Sami said...

I think I saw about 50 penises the one time I went on Chat Roulette and I was like okay I'm done. I get way too nervous to actually talk to people but the fact that you managed to watch people dance, solve their life problems, AND laugh at them. I just love you. LOTS.

StaceyFacex said...

Teehee loved alla this post

Nikki Mitchell said...

Ive always wanted to try Chat Roulette. Looks like its very entertaining. I probably wont try it unless I'm with friends and its a drunken boring night.

Nayah West said...

This post made me laugh so hard lol

Meredith @ Call Me What You Like said...

No judgement because this post was hilarious! thank you for providing pictures. That's amazing.