Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Greetings From The Wife in Training


Well helllllllo there, friends. It's a little dull and boring around here, and I'm only a little sorry about that. I'm still on vacation on the other side of the country with my family and I'm not spending much time around my computer (oh, the horror). Anyway, I have one of my favourite bloggers (ever) standing in for me today, ans I'm so excited to introduce you all to her. I'm just going to let her take it away and I'll keep the rambling to a minimum. Everyone, meet Lindsay (and Lindsay, meet everyone).
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Hi there folks! Wait, I should say “howdy!” No...it doesn’t feel right. I may be from Texas but I have never met a real Texan who actually says “howdy” in daily life except my baby brother who goes to a school that is probably a cult Texas A&M where they’re forced to say it to random passersby but that is neither here nor there and now I’m just rambling, which isn’t a very good first impression.

Let’s start over, shall we?

HI.


My name is Lindsay, and I blog over at The Wife in Training. Faith asked me to fill in for her while she’s on vacation (without me, the nerve) and because I am SUCH a good friend of course I agreed. Before we go any farther, we should get to know each other a little better (#TWSS?). I’ll start. I’ve lived in Texas all my life, I prefer tacos over most any other food, I drink pinot grigio like it’s my job and a little over a year ago I married some guy that I picked up in a bar (okay, so we technically went to the same college and technically had lots of mutual friends – but I technically made the first move and it was technically in a bar, therefore I picked him up in a bar. Technically.).

Anyhooker. I recently noticed that my pants are on the snugger side of things. I put down my pinot grigio and plate of cheese and said to my husband, “Something must be done.” So now here we are, I’m eight days into the new 30-minute P90X system. I decided today to share with you lovelies some of the thoughts that go through one’s mind during a workout with Mr. Tony Horton.

Thoughts One Has During P90X-3

Minute 1: I can do this. I can totally do this.
Minute 2: Alright, this isn’t so ba– owww! Nope. I’m good. Sooooo strong right now.
Minute 3: What do you mean “warm-up over?”
Minute 7: This is literally the worst decision I’ve ever made.
Minute 10: There is no possible way I will make it out of this workout alive.
Minute 12: What did I ever do to you Tony Horton?!
Minute 16: What the hell is a crunchy frog?


Minute 16 and 5 seconds: NOPE. Nope nope nope.
Minute 19: He’s for sure trying to kill me. I’m going to die here.
Minute 26: WHEN WILL THIS TORTURE END?!?!
Minute 30: Thank the good Lord above that’s over. Excuse me while I lay here in an ocean of my own sweat and misery.

One hour later...

I totally deserve this entire bottle of pinot grigio. And probably this entire pan of brownies. I’m going to be soooooooo skinny.

The end. Thanks for letting me hang out today, and thanks Faith for taking a vacation so I could fill in for you and make lots of new friends. See you all around the interwebs!

---The Wife in Training




4 comments:

allieology said...

Pretty dang accurate there Linds. Pretty dang accurate. Hey Faith. HOW ABOUT YOU STOP VACATIONING AND COME BACK?

Jay T said...

"What the hell is a crunchy frog?" It sounds like a Parisian delicacy and it does not sound like an exercise move that should be done at 6am. Nopenopenope Tony Horton? Tony WHOREton.

Becca @ Becoming Adorrable said...

Is "anyhooker" your new thing?

Nikki Mitchell said...

LMAO i loved this post! P90X is something that makes me have nightmares...and this just confirmed why im so afraid.