Guacamole, You Say?

I don't like guacamole and chips..
.. said no Juan, ever.

This post is going to be a little here, a little there, and basically a crap-ton of random.. 'Cause it's my blog and I call the shots, and if you don't like it then... that's just fine (I was trying to sound intense, but the Canadian in me really just wants to apologize for being rude. Crap). I told you this was going to be all over the place, right? Yeah, cause it already is.

So last night I was FaceTiming with one of my best friends from back home - who doesn't live on the East Coast anymore either, but she doesn't live here either, so it's basically like she still lives at home, so I'm going with it.
I WILL TRY AND STOP WRITING RIDICULOUSLY LONG SENTENCES... STARTING NOW (Juliette, that yelling was just for you... you're welcome).

Anyway, I was on FaceTime with Nikki and we were talking about a few nonsensical (ha, I really just wanted to use this word) things and my blog came up in conversation. Nikki asked what I was going to write about today and I just stared at her blankly. She came up with some not so awesome suggestions.. her first one: Guacamole.

You want me to write an entire post about guacamole, Nikki? Are you kidding me? Okay, lets see what I've got.

Guacamole is delicious, whether you eat it with hot-fresh-salty tortilla chips, in a burrito bowl at Chipotle, or eat it out of a dish with a spoon like the classy broad that you are - guacamole is the epitome of delicious.
It's heavenly, orgasmic (sorry mom), and downright perfect.

However, I have had some bad guacamole in my days. This, in itself, is a cause for infinite sad faces, my friends. Truly. There's nothing worse than taking a tortilla chip, dipping it into the delicious looking guacamole, and popping that sucker in your mouth only to be disappointed. All of that build up, AND NO SATISFACTION. I'm sorry, but no.
That's not okay.



My homegirl, Ellen, knows exactly WHAT IS UP. Why is this still a problem? It is 2013 here people, we need GOOD SOLID CHIPS THAT CAN HOLD A SUBSTANTIAL AMOUNT OF GUACAMOLE. I mean, come on. This is really all that I'd like from life. Okay, that was a bit dramatic - but this needs to be solved, and stat. As much as I enjoy eating my guacamole with a spoon (I do not believe in discrimination and there will be NO GUACAMOLE LEFT BEHIND), I feel as though we really need some solid chips that we can depend on. Somebody should work on this.

I digress...

Nikki went on a 5-minute long tangent about how guacamole is so delicious but it's annoying that it's really ridiculously popular for no reason. Yo, Nikki, imma let you finish - but can we take a second to discuss the fact that guacamole is definitely the Gretchen Weiners of Mexican dips/condiments?



Back to Nikki - I had to bite my tongue from saying 'IT IS POPULAR FOR A GOOD REASON, FOOL'... but she's my best friend, and I'm Canadian... so that means I called her a twat and let it slide. KIDDING. I wouldn't do that.
Despite her nonesense, she raised a valid point about guacamole though... she said that it's just glorified avocados. Yes, yes, it is. But it is the HOLY GRAIL of avocados. And those avocados can go ahead and be glorified all day, e'ryday as far as I'm concerned. Because, case in point, Nikki... GUACAMOLE IS DELICIOUS.

If and when she reads this post, she's probably going to kill me for writing it. But, this is what happens when you JOKE ABOUT BLOG IDEAS WITH A BLOGGER... especially one who has no shame and will literally write about anything.

I'm done talking about guacamole now, I think. But in all fairness, I did start out by warning you that this post was going to be all over the place. It's basically the biggest cluster f@&$ of a post to hit my blog since the time I went on the worst date with the biggest douchebag and thought it was appropriate to blog about it (this link literally has NOTHING to do with this guacamole post).


If this isn't how you say guacamole, then you're saying it WRONG, and you can't sit with us.

I, legitimately, was going to go on another tangent about some of the other things that Nikki talked about, but I think I like the idea of this post being solely about guacamole. Good day.

Yes, there were a few missed 'that's what she said' moments throughout this blog post, those are just for you Allie.

Sparkle Louder with Hpnotiq for a chance to WIN WIN WIN

Hi friends, I have something really exciting to share with all of you today!
I hope you don't already have plans for New Year's Eve, and if you do - you might need to cancel them. There is an AMAZING contest going on right now which gives you a chance to win a trip for you and THREE of your girlfriends to go to New York City!! Um, HELLO - who wouldn't want to win this contest?


I did my own Sparkle Louder picture to show you how easy it is. I'm kind of obsessed with the sparkles.

To enter the contest, just go to the Hpnotiq contest page and follow the easy steps to create your own Sparkle Louder picture (using their app) just like the one I made, above. Upload a picture - from your computer, facebook, or instagram - and add as much sparkle as your little heart desires. Fill in all of your details, and just like that - you're done. Easy, right?

You can't really tell in the picture above (because it's black and white), but I'm wearing my favorite pair of pants - they're mint green and fabulous. Despite the fact that mint green isn't entirely appropriate as a winter color, I'll be wearing these pants on New Year's Eve because they add that perfect amount of pizzazz to my outfit, and it's how I'll Sparkle Louder! I'm a big fan of wearing fitted jeans and a cute top, especially a sparkly top - which is exactly what I'd wear if I won this trip! Even though I won't be watching the ball drop in New York this NYE, I will definitely be having a party with lots of Hpnotiq cocktails.



As much as we would all love to win the fabulous Grand Prize trip to NYC, there can only be one winner (plus her girlfriends, duh). BUT! But, but, but! Don't worry! You can still win one of Hpnotiq's other amazing prizes, they're giving away 20 Effy Diamond and Blue Topaz rings - 4 sweepstakes prizes are given away each week!
Oh, and remember that when you're sharing your sparkling images on social media (twitter, instagram, etc), be sure to use the hashtag #SparkleLouder!

I'm a little, okay, a lot jealous of whoever wins this Hpnotiq's contest, because I would LOVE to ring in the New Year with my favorite girls in NYC. It's basically like your own version of Sex and the City. Why are you still reading this post? Go enter, now!

Contest runs from November 4th - December 8th, 2013.

Just remember that you have to be of legal drinking age to be eligible to win this fabulous prize.

Oh you know, just some shenanigans

It's Monday! Which means it's time to link up with the fabulous Sami for some weekend shenanigans.



Technically today isn't a real/usual 'Monday' to me, because it's a stat holiday and I don't have to work... so I'm probably still sleeping right now. Thank goodness for being able to schedule posts.



one. Selfie, as usual.
two. Delicious, delicious, delicious.
three. I destroyed this bottle of wine. By myself.
four. My dog thinks that he's a "lap-dog". It's cute.
five. I think fall is officially coming to an end. View on Saturday's run in my neighborhood.
six. The greatest homemade sandwich I've ever seen. No, I didn't eat this. But I wanted to.
seven. Sunday Funday workout.
eight. This is why Amanda isn't allowed to bake... she struggles. Notice her phone under all that flour.
nine. Pumpkin protein pancake with natural peanut butter, raspberries, and bananas. YUM.

On Saturday, I went thrift shopping with my friends - Amanda and Alex. One of the stores that we went to was an amazing vintage boutique clothing store. This woman had SO MANY one of a kind articles of clothing and we were in awe. She made us try on so many different things for her - just for fun. We spent probably an hour or an hour and a half in this one store just to entertain her and her sales associate. The two of them sat on the couch in the changing area, ate their dinner and watched us play dress up. She kept telling us that we were giving her 'dinner and a show'... it was a hilarious experience to say the least. I made a collage of my favorite outfits that I tried on...



Today is Remembrance Day, which is a day where we take time to remember those who have fought for our country. Please take a moment to remember them today, and give a moment of silence on their behalf.

I still fall... a lot

I feel like it's been a long time since I've shared any of my clumsy tales on the blog... so today I'm going to share three separate incidents that have all happened in the past week. Just because I don't always share my stories on here, it doesn't mean that they don't still happen.

I've been known to fall on the bus, lose my pants while chasing the bus down a crowded street, fall through a deck, walk into any table or door, and trip over every sidewalk. Like I said, just because the stories haven't made it onto the blog in a hot minute - it doesn't mean that they've stopped.


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Exhibit A:

Last Friday, Amanda and I were leaving a football game and walking to a local bar to hangout before heading home for the night. En route from the stadium to the bar, we had to walk under an entire sidewalk covered in scaffolding. Normally, this wouldn't be such a problem or seem like a big deal, but we were walking behind a group of about 7 or 8 guys and they were walking too slowly for my liking... so I decided to walk past them and cut through the scaffolding ahead of them so that I wouldn't be stuck behind them the whole time.

You know how the scaffolding bars/pipes do a criss-cross thing? Yeah, I didn't see it. Like, at all. I smoked my head off of the 'criss-cross' part as I was trying to cut in front of them. The entire group of men saw this, laughed and proceeded to make comments the ENTIRE way to the bar. Amanda was laughing, I was laughing and possibly cursing, and the guys were shouting things like: "SHE CAN TAKE IT LIKE A CHAMP!" "OOOOOH THAT HAD TO HURT - YOU'LL FEEL THAT TOMORROW" or my personal favourite,
"God love Canadian girls, they know how to take a good hit and just keep going".

Yes, I took the hit like a champ and kept on walking to the bar. But I'm not going to lie - it hurt REALLY badly and continued to hurt for a few days.


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Exhibit B:

I was running late and had to actually run for the bus one morning last week. I saw the bus coming down the street but I knew if I bolted across the street, and the few blocks down, that I would be able to make it to the stop just as the bus was getting there. As I'm running across the street (I live on a busy 6-lane highway type street), my music that's blaring in my ears from my iPhone just stops playing. I assumed I had somehow unhooked my headphones but continued running. As I'm sprinting for the bus stop, I'm feeling around in my pocket and my purse to grab my phone - but I can't find it. Anywhere.

I stop on the spot, squat to the ground, and frantically search through my bag - my phone is not there. I panic and start running back towards my house. Just at that exact moment, I see my poor phone lying helpless in the middle of the highway street and I watch as it is run over by not one, but two cars (and possibly the bus that I missed).


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I think I yelled at a few cars not to run over my phone, because I'm crazy like that. I then proceeded to run into the middle of the street (with traffic coming at me) to grab my phone before it was run over by yet another car. Somehow, miraculously, the phone was 100% okay. No scratches, no marks, nothing. Thank god for my Otter Box case. It's a miracle, I swear.

Exhibit C:

Last night I decided to go for a quick run when I got home from work. Despite the fact that it was only 6:00pm it was already completely pitch black dark outside. Instead of running my regular route, which primarily involves alley-ways, I had to run along all of the streets throughout my neighborhood. I was so focused on not tripping over the sidewalk, or slipping on leaves; that I was continuously looking down at the ground instead of looking straight ahead. This worked out really well, I didn't trip... but I did run into a tree. I then started laughing at my sheer stupidity and looked up to see a family of 4 staring at me as I casually jogged away giggling laughing hysterically and texting my friends to tell them what I had done. No shame, friends. No shame.






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Typical Shenanigans

Happy Monday, lovelies.

Since it's Monday, I'm obviously linking up with my girl, Sami. My weekend was pretty low-key but here's a quick glance at what I was up to the past couple of days...



one. Post squat/run workout.
two. Hanging out at JJ Bean coffee shop with Amanda - don't worry, this isn't coffee.
three. Last week I gave myself a squat challenge. 500 squats per day for a total of 2,500.
four. Selfie before Saturday's run.
five. I indulged in the most delicious cheat meal, ever, on Saturday night. Mmmmm.
six. Facetimed with my brother, his girlfriend, and my cousins for a bit.
seven. Selfie before brunch with friends.
eight. Brunch is my favorite.
nine. Sunday afternoon's workout - 8k walk (with sprinting intervals) and a bit of strength training.

I hope you all have a fabulous start to your week - see you tomorrow!